Dear 2020,
This marks a decade of writing letters to the new year. The past ten years have been a time of dramatic change and transition as I’ve carved out a new way of life for myself. It’s largely been wonderful, but there have also been plenty of dark nights of the soul woven into the experience. Most of my previous new year’s letters (and resolutions) have reflected on the past year with a feeling of “Good riddance, that was hard,†combined with “Please New Year, be nice to me.†Yet this year feels different. I woke up New Year’s Day with tranquil gratitude, and a clear sense of what this year’s resolution will be.
Here’s why:
As a woman who has had creative aspirations and spiritual explorations for as long as I can remember, you would think that listening to my intuition—my gut feeling—would be second nature. But after going to law school to hone my analytical skills, and then jumping into the business world, things got complicated. When I’d receive what might be an intuitive hit, my mind would get involved and start analyzing things from every angle before I finally acted. By that time, all that overthinking confused things and I could no longer determine what my intuition was telling me in the first place. My brain always got in the way.
Speaking of brains, I have two of them—one in my head, and one in my gut. The second brain is super duper smart, and, amongst other things, it controls the digestive system without any help from the central nervous system. Scientists call this our enteric nervous system, or ENS. Now here’s where it gets really interesting: the ENS also influences mood, behavior, and thoughts. Not only that, but gut microbiota (trillions of diverse bacteria that live inside the colon) are also important for preventing, and even treating, some diseases.
The two brains communicate in healthy people, making sure that our minds and bodies are a well-oiled machine. That’s the symbiosis necessary for listening to a gut feeling and acting on one’s intuition. Unfortunately, I haven’t been very kind to my 2nd brain over the years. I was a pretty sickly kid and spent a lot of my childhood on antibiotics. As a young adult, I’d pop antibiotics like candy at the slightest sniffle.
I’d tell my doctors, “I know my body, and this will turn into bronchitis if I don’t nip it in the bud.â€
The doctors would always quickly write a prescription without actually walking me through the fact that I likely had a virus and viruses are not treatable by antibiotics. The result of living my life this way is I have always had a very messed up gut. In addition to killing disease causing bacteria, antibiotics also kill the good bacteria in your gut, leaving your health (mental and physical) potentially compromised.
I wised up as I got older and embraced a healthy diet and lifestyle. Now, instead of popping antibiotics, I popped probiotics. But alas, I couldn’t figure out how to fix my gut. For years I struggled with IBS and food intolerances, as well as brain fog and anxiety. All of these things can be linked to compromised gut microbiome.
Last September I was on a broad spectrum antibiotic for a sinus infection that probably would have eventually gone away on its own. Once that antibiotic killed all my good gastrointestinal bacteria, an evil intruder bacterium called C. diff moved into my colon to play house. This almost killed me. After spending a week in the hospital with sepsis, I relapsed a second time. Because this was my third related episode (making it very clear that the strong antibiotics I was on for C. diff were doing jack for getting me better), I finally qualified for a fecal microbiota transplant. This was one of the greatest gifts I’ve ever received. Not only did it save my life and cure me (immediately!), but my gut is now healthier than it has ever been. I’ll write more about the fecal transplant another time. They say it takes 3 months for my microbiome to match my donor’s, so I’m still getting to know my new innards. But suffice it to say that a fecal transplant really just may be the Spice Melange.
When you are given the gift of life, it’s something to celebrate. So it goes without saying that this year my new year’s resolution is all about the gut. I’m going to pay attention to my second brain and feed it food that helps the good bacteria flourish and that discourages the bad guys from setting up shop. And with healthy new gut microbiome, I’ll now be able to better listen to my gut feelings so that I accurately hear the voice of my intuition without my analytical first brain stepping in and making me second guess the message.
My doctor told me my gut is like a beautiful garden. For it to thrive, I need to tend to it, and give it food and water. If I take care of it, it will give back by helping keep me healthy and strong. So New Year, my promise to you is that this year it’s all about my gut.
In closing, Year 2020, I think I love you already.
Sincerely,
Kee Kee
Visit the Peggy Lillis Foundation for information and resources related to C. diff.
Comments on this entry are closed.